Every year, on the 8th of March, in Romania, my home-country, we celebrate Women`s Day and Mother`s Day. Every women receives flowers and presents and text messages and every man takes more care of the women next to him on this day more than on the other ones of the year (although he should take care of her everyday in the same manner). I am not going to give you too much details, I just wanted to explain the context in which I am writing this post.
We live in a men`s world. Yes, we women that are celebrated today, we live in a men`s world. And we do not complain too much about it. Because we are too concentrated on being equal to them, making efforts everyday and trying to give our best to be as they are. But no matter how many times you will pull your chair by yourself at the table, no matter how many times you will open by yourself every door you encounter, no matter how many times you will struggle to carry all those heavy groceries bags, no matter how strong you want to seem, you are so different from them. And despite their power, their strong tone in their voice, their strong arms, their muscles, they will always be weaker from one point f view.
Now, do not get me wrong. I have a father and a brother back home and I don`t want to make them feel bad about their gender. In the past few months, I have realised that men are weak while managing companies, teams, being the bosses and so on. You might be surprised, but how many times have you looked at your boss during working hours and saw him as a beast and after work you saw him as a normal person, with flaws and mistakes, worries and so on?!
This is what I am talking about. No matter how much women desire to be equal to men, once they are in a higher position, they will always distinguish themselves from men. Because although they are the bosses, they do things with care. They do not lose their character, nor personality. They keep their “feminism” and they are not afraid of showing their “human” side, just because their employers might lose their respect and attention. They can express an idea and make their point without shouting, thus with a calm voice, full of confidence. They can manage teams and companies and people around them while managing their own lives as well. Because they do not leave their real personalities at the front door of the building, just because they are scared that people are going to disobey them. They know how to control, express themselves and make themselves clear without raising voices, thus looking in your eyes and giving you “push” only from one look.
I do not want to say that men are not good leaders. But what I do not understand is their strategy of losing their character and winning the respect of their employers. It is a high price to pay. It is enough that you are a man. People see you a strong person from the moment they realise you are a man. Because this is the perception of the majority. Borrow the look of a women who leads and has power to move even mountains from their place, and you will not have to start shouting to gain the respect of others. And at the end of the day, you can quit wearing that mask of a “beast” without any feelings. Try not to fool yourself. Your employers sometimes realise you are still a human with feelings and flaws. You do not have to become a robot just for them to see you as a boss. Because you will only hear good things in your face, but bad things in your back. And be sure that the rate of having long-term employers by your side, will decrease.
Through this post I just wanted to remind to all women how special they are at work. Because in the past decades, women are more concentrated on their careers and try to bring money in the house, and again, be equal with men. But stop running after equality. You are succesful from the moment you are a women with a sever look, but caring hands. With a firm voice, but warm at the same time. And men do not know your secrets. They are still searching for power in screams, multitude of gestures and wrong choice of words. This is the truth, no matter what men will say, you have your own method of managing people, but it is sad how many men forget to manage themselves before the others.
P.S. I have a true example in my life and just wanted to remind her how well she manages everything she does.
Happy Women`s Day!